Heller, Trudy Gayle (Mrs.) 1942-2021

HELLER, HIRSCHMAN

Posted By: Wilma J. Vande Berg - volunteer (email)
Date: 10/21/2021 at 20:01:47

On Friday July 2, 2021, the world lost a beautiful soul. The doctors say “septic shock” and shock is the perfect word. Two days after falling ill, Trudy Gayle Hirschman Heller, 79, left this world in the arms and hearts of her family. Beloved mother of seven children. Bewildered grandmother of 13. The soul of an artist set free.
Born and raised in the corn fields of Yankton, South Dakota, and Hawarden, Iowa, Trudy found beauty in the rituals and music of the Catholic Church, getting up early to sing at Mass before going to school in a one-room schoolhouse. A Music Education major at Marycrest in Davenport, Iowa, University of South Dakota, and University of St. Mary in Kansas, she honed her talents into a maker of beautiful sound: a formidable lyric soprano (translation: she could sing loud and high) and pianist.
Marriage and graduation led to her next role: a maker of beautiful children. Midway through an olympic effort of producing seven children in 11 years, Trudy arrived in the South Bend area. Somehow finding time (she claims she drank two pots of coffee a day), she performed lead roles with the South Bend Players Theatre Group and guest artist roles with the IUSB opera department.
With a busy gaggle of kids, making beautiful sounds morphed into supervising piano lessons (not so beautiful), family sing-alongs in the music room (not bad), and loud singing every Sunday at church (exquisite, but oh so embarrassing to her kids as pew after pew would turn to look for the source of “that voice”). What we would give to hear her right now.
Trudy was a maker of a beautiful home. She filled it with antiques and fine crystal and china, a daring maneuver for a house full of young kids. As those same kids grew older, she filled her home with people. The fullness of her heart grew in direct proportion to the number of people around her. Trudy’s house was the epicenter of fun: swimming, billiards, board games, pre-ND game meetups, BBQs and tent sleepouts. Once across the “Backdoor Guests are Best” welcome sign, you were family. After the kids flew the nest, she continued to share her home as a patron of the South Bend Symphony, volunteer hosting artists and musicians in her sacred space.
Trudy also had a keen eye for jewelry and fashion. She had her “colors done” in the 80s (and please don’t gift her with anything outside of her color wheel) and was always impeccably dressed with much attention paid to the accessories, finishing the picture beautifully. Looking fabulous on the outside, however, hid feeling lousy on the inside.
Life dealt Trudy the decidedly not beautiful diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis in 1980 at the age of 38, and she spent the next 41 years refusing to let it define or limit her. With grit and determination, she continued on her beautiful journey. She raised her children, playing the role of chief cheerleader and taxi driver, and found a vocal home at the Basilica of the Sacred Heart at the University of Notre Dame where she was the lead cantor for almost 20 years. Weddings, funerals, weekly masses, and international Catholic conferences, Trudy’s voice could be found lifting the congregations.
Trudy found beautiful, life-long friendships in two mothers’ groups and two different book clubs. These women have lunched through IT ALL together and their support and wisdom meant the world to Trudy. The book clubs especially combined two of Trudy’s loves – community and books.
Ah, books. Trudy loved books, loved to read. Anything. Everything. Remember that one-room schoolhouse? Trudy happily spent her school day reading a set of encyclopedias while the teacher taught the younger kids, resulting in a breadth of knowledge and words that made her unbeatable in Trivial Pursuit and Scrabble years later. She always had a book (or three) as she jetted around the country visiting her children and beautiful grandchildren. (Grandchildren are even more beautiful to mothers than their children.)
Trudy’s love of beauty can also be seen in her actions, who she was. Known as The Lap and The Baby Whisperer, one of Trudy’s greatest joys was to hold her children’s newborn children. For hours. She spent two decades incubating 13 grandbabies, wrapping them in beautiful warmth and unconditional love. And she shared this inner beauty with more than family. She made a point to smile at strangers because who knows what others are going through, best to just be kind. A smile might make their day.
Kind, loyal and generous, everyone from airport wheelchair porters to McDonald’s drive-thru workers were recipients of her generosity, receiving generous tips or “magic envelopes” of cash to make Christmas dreams come true. Trudy had an artist’s soul, finding and spreading beauty in this world.
Trudy is survived by her seven children, five sons- and daughters-in-law, and 13 grandchildren: Brigid & Tim Scannell (Shane, Spencer, Kenna), Megan Heller McGinnis, Heidi & Steven Banks (Baxter, Deacon), Rock & Carol (Austin Nichols, Lauren, Lindsey, Ashley), Heather & John Seckinger (Ruby, Jetta), Luke & Julie (Sarah, Zachary), and Shauna, all of whom have spent countless beautiful hours trying to help Trudy manage her technology. She is also survived by her dear brother and sister-in-law, Mike and Donna Hirschman, and their three children and their families. Trudy was preceded in death by her parents, George and Clarissa Hirschman.
A beautiful soul, gone but never forgotten. Rest in peace, Mom.
A Celebration of Life will be held on Saturday July 10th, 11 am – 3 pm at Knollwood Country Club. Friends and family welcome.