Bickley, Brenda "Dee" 1941-2012

BICKLEY, BROWN, LANDA, NEWKIRK, FARRIS, WILLIAMS, ARCHER, JONES, NEIL

Posted By: Volunteer Transcriber
Date: 4/9/2020 at 13:02:42

Brenda Bickley
February 14, 1941 - February 5, 2012
Born in Nevada, Texas
Resided in West Des Moines, IA

Brenda Bickley—known as Darnell to her Texas family, Dee to all her Iowa and Florida friends, and "Mama Dee" to her grandchildren—of West Des Moines passed away February 5, 2011 at the Bright Kavanagh House in Des Moines. Services will be Saturday, February 11, 2012 at 11:00 a.m. at Lutheran Church of Hope in West Des Moines.

Dee—a sweetheart to friends and strangers alike—was, appropriately, born on Valentine's Day in 1941 in Nevada, TX, to Frank Lawhorn and Nella (Neil) Brown. The oldest of four children, she accomplished much in her life. Her childhood was graced with music, and Dee played both piano and clarinet. Dee graduated from Mesquite (TX) High School at 16. She went on to graduate from North Texas State University (now the University of North Texas) in Denton, with a major in education and minor in geography.

In 1968 she moved to Des Moines, initially teaching 3rd grade at Howe Elementary School. Five years later, she was named Outstanding Young Educator of the Year for the State of Iowa. Her teaching role evolved into an administrative position, working to create the concepts and curriculum for Des Moines' magnet schools—King, Edmunds and Perkins—as part of the district's desegregation plans. During this time, she earned master's degrees in both remedial reading and education administration from Drake University in Des Moines. After 15 years with the school system, she moved to Ida Grove, successfully working in the housing industry for several years. In 1991, she returned to West Des Moines, where she's lived ever since.

All her life, she has gathered friends attracted by her soft, gentle manner, charm and an absolutely hardy laugh that first surprises and then quickly captivates others. Friends would remain amazed at her unfettered graciousness toward all.

For almost 20 years, Dee and her constant companion, Tom Van Hon, traveled—grand trips to Russia and Mexico, weekends on the Mississippi, fishing in Florida and power walking there with Paradise Point women. She loved the opera and the symphony, Willie Nelson and reading. She created circles of friends from Texas to Iowa to Florida, and everywhere, church friends. Each felt as though he or she had been part of her life forever. She joyfully engaged with her grandchildren, with whom she shared a special bond of unconditional love. She reveled in good conversation at nice restaurants and in great cups of coffee. She hated to miss weekend breakfasts with friends in favorite grocery stores. Wherever she happened to be, she was at home.

During the last 3 years, Dee battled aggressive colon cancer with the same mix of graciousness and grit that had molded her life. In spring of 2011, after a second round of chemo, she received a clean bill of health at her checkup and joyfully lived a few blessed, carefree months. When the cancer returned in December, Dee faced death with quiet grace, dignity, honesty and comfortable acceptance. She planned her own service at Lutheran Church of Hope, with a second memorial service to be held with family in north Texas. Her cremains will be buried near her mother's grave in Farmersville, TX.

Dee leaves behind devoted daughters Karen Landa of West Des Moines and Sondra (Tom) Newkirk of Des Moines; and five grandchildren: Rachel Farris, Tyler Farris, Maxwell Newkirk, Alex Newkirk and Baxter Newkirk.

She is also survived by siblings Frank Neil (Janet) Brown, Sandra (Jeff) Williams, and Bob Brown. She is also survived by treasured aunts and uncle Dorothy Archer, Emma Jones, and Pat Neil, and Brown family cousins. Dee was preceded in death by her parents. Her family wishes to acknowledge the extraordinary care by the Bright Kavanaugh Hospice team, and suggests that memorial contributions be made in Dee's honor to HCI Foundation in lieu of flowers.

ARRANGEMENTS BY ILES FUNERAL HOMES ~ DUNN'S CHAPEL. ~ The Iles Funeral Home - Dunn's Chapel, Des Moines, IA Thurs 09 Feb 2012.